AtE: Episode 4

Sorry for the delay in getting this up!

This episode is the "What would Luke look for in a girl" episode...enjoy!

We'll get to the rest of your questions in the next installment. 

:)

Things I love

...okay, I have to say it - I've been loving Pinterest. There are so many good ideas on there for just about everything imaginable. Plus pretty pictures! :)  I've been loving finding things like these...

So many pretty things, yummy recipes and ideas for crafty stuff!

All of us need a reminder sometimes to:

The Power of a Positive Wife: Chapter 3

This poor blog has been neglected for a bit, but I'm going to try and do better about posting on here. :)

I was doing a series on the book The Power of a Positive Wife.  I said... 

"When we were staying with my grandparents on furlough, I happened to see a book on Nanna's shelf that was entitled, "The Power of a Positive Wife".  I thought it looked interesting, so I picked it up and started to thumb through it.  Before I knew it, I had my notebook and pen out, furiously taking notes.  My sweet and generous Nanna saw me, laughed a little, and gave me another copy she happened to have tucked away!

I thought I would take one blog post at at time, and share some good parts from each chapter!

Now, I'm obviously not a wife, but I really love this book; it has so many good points.  Even though it's about how wives should relate to their husbands (which is very helpful to read, even though I'm not married yet), it has so many things I can apply to everyday life with my family".

...I got a little sidetracked, but I wanted to pick up where I left off and finish the series.

Chapter 3: The Truth about true Love

This chapter deals with some myths that many have about love, and how they affect our views of marriage and commitment.  We'll take a sampling of just a few.

Myth #1: There's one "true love" for me. Once I find him, we'll get married and live happily ever after.

Let me first say that I completely believe that God can providentially work to bring two certain people together.  My sister and her husband, for example - I believe that there was providential working involved.  Even though they were oceans apart, things worked out so they could begin talking, and eventually meet, and later get married.  That being said, let's see what the author says about this first myth.

"...Movies, love songs and novels have created a surreal picture of the perfect romance...If you hold to the mind-set that each of us has one perfect, true love out there, what do you do when you realize that your spouse is not so lovable at times?...Certainly, we should look for a spouse who exhibits the character qualities and Christian values that we know we want in a lifelong partner. But when we find that seemingly perfect guy, we must accept the fact that love will still be work...True love doesn't mean having a relationship of ease; it means making the continual choice to love and forgive".

This is so true.  Even with siblings, it takes work to love.  It takes work to speak kindly when you're angry.  Many times it might be easier to stay upset, but it takes work to forgive and forget.  Love is a decision.  It takes nurturing, like a tender plant that must be watered and cared for every day.  If the plant is not watered, it will shrivel and die.  

Myth #3: I can fall out of love with my spouse.

This one is all too common! How many people have you heard say, "We were in love when we first got married, but since then we've just fallen out of love".  That could more accurately be translated as "I'm not willing to work at loving him\her anymore".  Like what was said in myth #1, true love is a decision, and not something we fall in or out of.  Sure, it's probably easier to love during the honeymoon than when you're sleep deprived and tired of seeing dirty socks on the floor and dishes in the sink, but we can still choose to love when it's difficult. "True love loves past the weaknesses and builds on the strengths".

~*~

Principles from this chapter: Love is not simply discovered; it is created, and it takes work...and marital love is a commitment encompassing affection, friendship, pleasure, and selfless love. 

_____

Hope you all are having a wonderful Lord's Day!

Love never ends

Right now I'd like to ask prayers on behalf of the Morton and Heck families as they go through the rough time of losing dear Shauna.

Shauna battled hard with cancer for two long years, and her struggle is now over.  

Aunt Shauna - right, with sister Chasity, left

 A wonderful example to all, she was truly one of the best examples I've ever had.

She was constantly in pain

~however~

She was bright

happy

full of smiles and laughter

never complaining

always unselfish

always trusting in God

encouraging 

kind

patient

While she may not be with us anymore here on earth, she is now well and whole, being comforted by the mighty hand of God.

We have the comfort of knowing that someday, we will be reunited in The Place where there will never be suffering, pain, or tears.  

But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about those who are asleep, that you may not grieve as others do who have no hope.

~I Thessalonians 4:13~

The Power of a Positive Wife: Chapter 1

Last time, we took a peek at the introduction for this book.  This post will take an overview of chapter one of The Power of a Positive Wife.

Chapter 1 [part one]: The Impact of a Positive Wife

 This chapter starts out asking the question, "If you could choose the one ingredient that makes a great wife, what would it be?"..."What if her every waking moment is motivated by the question, 'What can I do to make my husband's world a better place?'...this would be great attention, but the most important ingredient is God-centerdness."  In this book, Karol Ladd stresses the important of a personal relationship with Christ, and spiritual growth.  If we're truly God-centered, and trying our best to apply biblical principles to our lives, we will try to please our husbands to the best of our ability.  Pleasing our husbands in everything, however, is not our #1 motivation.  "Her walk with God allows her to keep the other areas of her life in balance". 

Karol reminds that marriage is all about two unique individuals using their individual talents to strengthen and balance the marriage.  For, "Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work" (Eccl. 4:9).  We're encouraged to take stock of our talents and abilities, and find ways to use them in the best way.

In Romans 12:9-12, 15,16, Paul talks about devoted, true love.  He never asks if the other person treats us with love first.  "Showing love means helping others become better people".  The book states that we should be as blind to our husbands faults as we can, and encourage him in his good areas.  Obviously, she's not talking about a glaring sin problem, and occasions do arise when we'll need to point something out to the hubby that he can try to better himself at - she's simply talking about day to day life; encouraging us to dwell on the positive, not the negative!

When women are hurt by their husbands, they might often be tempted to try to get back at him by giving the silent treatment, use spiteful words, or even withhold intimacy.  Karol gives us the example of Paul.  He had "every right" to try to get even with his enemies, but he chose to forgive and move on.  "We need to practice the profound principle of forgiving...what does an I'm-going-to-get-you-back attitude do for us? Do they make us better people or just bitter ones?" 

 
Wives set the tone for their homes.  Proverbs 19:13, 14 says, "a nagging wife annoys like a constant dripping...but only the Lord can give an understanding wife".  Our attitudes and actions are like air fresheners.  If someone walks into our home, they can either breath in deeply and smile, or wrinkle their noses in disgust.

The last part of chapter one talks about control; Let's see what Karol has to say.  "What do wives want to control? Circumstances, for one.  We want to keep the people and things around us healthy, happy and safe.  Our families, for two.  Many of us want to control our husbands and children - to micromanage their every action."  She encourages us to identify what areas in our life we try to control, and turn it over to God.  It's not our job to try to control our families, and every circumstance in our life; when we see flaws in our husbands, sometimes we're tempted to think it's our job to try to change his ways, but that's not our job.  Our job is to encourage him in good ways, and take his name to God in prayer.

"What is your greatest weakness or challenge in your marriage?  We all know marriage is not a stroll down Easy Street...it's more like a drive Flaws and Weaknesses Lane...The question is not, 'Do you have challenges?' The question is, 'Where do you go for help, power, and strength through the challenges?"

 

Happy birthday, Candice!

Today is my friend Candice's birthday.  

Ah, how far we've come together!  We used to play with baby dolls, and nail polish, and convince the others to play dress up with us.  Now we talk every chance we get , even though we're separated by many miles.  We also have an insane number of nicknames for each other.  Alot of mine involve some form of 'Punkin'.  But let's not get too far into that...

We love to skype!

Happy birthday, Candice!

~Eye Heart Ewe!~

~July 23, 2010~

How I love weddings!  It's just so beautiful to see two people so in love be put together for the rest of their lives.  

This wedding was especially wonderful though, because I was able to watch my only sister walk down the aisle and be joined to one of the best men I've ever known.  

Their faces say it all

 Everything was beautiful!

During the ceremony before Dad turned Julia over to Lee, he lifted her veil and kissed her cheek.

*tear*

She's my best friend.

~*~

Congratulations, Lee and Jewels!  

"Many waters cannot quench love,
neither can floods drown it..."

~Song of Solomon 8:7~

The Sendoff

We had Julia's bridal shower\"sendoff" Sunday afternoon, and it was amazing.  

 

 The table looked beautiful!

~*~

I had gone back with  Mrs. Stephanie to her house after services so I could help with some last minute preparations.  Mom and Julia got there at 2p.m., and then Mrs. Trina and the Gee girls came a bit later.  The Arusha ladies were about an hour late since services went longer than normal, and they had to get presents.  I was the "gate-girl", so when I heard them at the gate I went to get it.  When I opened it, all the ladies were in single file, standing in two rows.  They were figuring out who would stand where, and what song they should sing.  {NOTE: Please keep in mind that it was all ladies at the shower - no men were present!!! :)}  Once they had that figured out, they started singing and walking\dancing through the yard and onto the front porch.  After they'd taken their shoes off, they went inside and starting walking in a circle around the table in the dining room while they sang.  I was so glad to see them all come!  

After they had finished their song, they went into the living room and sat down.  At that point, some ladies from Moshi arrived.  It meant alot to us that they came - it's a long way from Moshi...I was so glad to see them!!!

We ate a nice lunch of little sandwiches, roasted nuts, fruit, and cake {nom nom}.  After all the dirty plates and cups were cleared away, Julia {looking absolutely beautiful} opened her presents from the missionary ladies.  The African ladies sang a little bit while she opened her gifts, but everything was very reserved. 

Then the ladies asked Mom to sit in a chair to the left of Julia, and told us that they weren't leaving, but had to go outside to get organized.  Mrs. Trina and the girl had to leave, so I went out and opened the gate for them.  When I got back to the porch, all the women were crowded close, holding their gifts - wooden spoons, khangas, baskets, etc.  Then, forming a line, they starting singing "It's a present for the girl, it's a present, even if it's small, a present!", and dancing into the house.  It was too crowded to get back in, so I joined line, and started singing and dancing as well.  Since I didn't have my present in my hand, I made my way to a empty spot, slipped out of the line and danced there instead.  If I would have thought of it at the time, I would've snatched up my present again, and continued in the line.  Oh well!

  

They went in a circle around the coffee table, until Mkunde (The lady at the beginning of the line) was in front again.  She danced, and waved her big basket around, twirling it in front of Julia's face, and above her head, then set it down at Mom's feet.  Each woman in line then, would demonstrate what her gift was {for example, if it was a khanga, wrap it around Jewels or themselves}, then put it in the basket.  It was loud.  Really loud!  Everyone was so happy, singing, dancing, and showing their gifts, along with the constant steam of "Aiyee! Aiyee! Aiyee!" sounds.  {Those sounds are so great to make, by the way!  Mom was able to edit some of the videos to make them decent to post a sample of} 

After everyone had put their gift in the basket, they all came and stood near me, and asked her to stand up and present the basket to Julia.  So, Mom took the basket, and handed it to Jewels.  All of us started singing, clapping, and swaying behind them.  If someone outside hadn't have known better, they would've thought that some indians were on the war-path with all that was going on in there!  

Once again, they asked Mom to sit in her chair, and said that they were going outside to "refresh".  :)  Then, they came in as before - singing\dancing single file, but this time held a long khanga over their heads.  This they brought and wrapped around Mom with much whooping and clapping.  Mom, Jewels, and I were having a really hard time keeping ourselves together.  After everyone sat again, a lady from each congregation took a turn making a little speech.  Most of them were about how well Mom has done with raising Julia to this point of her marriage.

Then people started going home, and after cleaning up a bit and stuffing some leftover cake in a tupperware, we went home as well.  It was a wonderful shower...none of us will forget it in a hurry, and Julia has wonderful presents reminding her of the people here.

:)

*Love you Jewels!*

Well hello February! When did you get here?

Oh February, what will you bring?  

-*-*-*-

Well, in about half an hour we're going to town to do some last minute shopping for snacks, etc. before Lee and Julia leave, going to eat supper, then going to the airport.  Julia's going back with Lee this month to spend some time there and meet his family.  It's been so great having Lee here.  It's been wonderful to get to  know him, and have him be with our family.

-*-*-*-

Lee, thank you so much.  Thank you for being what my sister needs...thank you for making her happy.

-*-*-*-

~(And what a *cute* couple they make!)~ 

:D

-*-*-*-

This month should be great!  Hopefully, I'm going to be able to get alot of things done.  I don't have enough time at the moment to reveeeal all my plans {insert evil chuckle}, but in my next post,  I'll fill you all in.  Oh yay!

-*-*-*-

Ok, it's off to town I go! 

:)

 

Please keep Lee and Julia in your prayers as they travel!

-*-*-*-

Lee + Julia = Love

Yes, it's true.  My dear, sweet sister is getting married!

~*~

She is always such a wonderful example to me ~ An example of patience, obedience, kindness, godliness,  faithfulness...the list goes on.

~*~

What an amazing sister and friend.  Preparing herself for the future, yet being patient and trusting in God at the same time.

~*~

Julia.  The greatest friend sister anyone could ask for.  Challenging me to try to be a better person and christian, one who would snuggle me close and play with dolls and tell me stories at night because I saw the Grinch's shadow on our bedroom wall, one who would brush and braid my hair...

~*~

Lee.  I couldn't ask for a better brother in law to be!  How glad and thankful I am that Jewels has you!  So godly, kind and caring.

~*~

Congratulations Lee and Julia!

~*~

~*~