The Power of a Positive Wife: Chapter 3

This poor blog has been neglected for a bit, but I'm going to try and do better about posting on here. :)

I was doing a series on the book The Power of a Positive Wife.  I said... 

"When we were staying with my grandparents on furlough, I happened to see a book on Nanna's shelf that was entitled, "The Power of a Positive Wife".  I thought it looked interesting, so I picked it up and started to thumb through it.  Before I knew it, I had my notebook and pen out, furiously taking notes.  My sweet and generous Nanna saw me, laughed a little, and gave me another copy she happened to have tucked away!

I thought I would take one blog post at at time, and share some good parts from each chapter!

Now, I'm obviously not a wife, but I really love this book; it has so many good points.  Even though it's about how wives should relate to their husbands (which is very helpful to read, even though I'm not married yet), it has so many things I can apply to everyday life with my family".

...I got a little sidetracked, but I wanted to pick up where I left off and finish the series.

Chapter 3: The Truth about true Love

This chapter deals with some myths that many have about love, and how they affect our views of marriage and commitment.  We'll take a sampling of just a few.

Myth #1: There's one "true love" for me. Once I find him, we'll get married and live happily ever after.

Let me first say that I completely believe that God can providentially work to bring two certain people together.  My sister and her husband, for example - I believe that there was providential working involved.  Even though they were oceans apart, things worked out so they could begin talking, and eventually meet, and later get married.  That being said, let's see what the author says about this first myth.

"...Movies, love songs and novels have created a surreal picture of the perfect romance...If you hold to the mind-set that each of us has one perfect, true love out there, what do you do when you realize that your spouse is not so lovable at times?...Certainly, we should look for a spouse who exhibits the character qualities and Christian values that we know we want in a lifelong partner. But when we find that seemingly perfect guy, we must accept the fact that love will still be work...True love doesn't mean having a relationship of ease; it means making the continual choice to love and forgive".

This is so true.  Even with siblings, it takes work to love.  It takes work to speak kindly when you're angry.  Many times it might be easier to stay upset, but it takes work to forgive and forget.  Love is a decision.  It takes nurturing, like a tender plant that must be watered and cared for every day.  If the plant is not watered, it will shrivel and die.  

Myth #3: I can fall out of love with my spouse.

This one is all too common! How many people have you heard say, "We were in love when we first got married, but since then we've just fallen out of love".  That could more accurately be translated as "I'm not willing to work at loving him\her anymore".  Like what was said in myth #1, true love is a decision, and not something we fall in or out of.  Sure, it's probably easier to love during the honeymoon than when you're sleep deprived and tired of seeing dirty socks on the floor and dishes in the sink, but we can still choose to love when it's difficult. "True love loves past the weaknesses and builds on the strengths".

~*~

Principles from this chapter: Love is not simply discovered; it is created, and it takes work...and marital love is a commitment encompassing affection, friendship, pleasure, and selfless love. 

_____

Hope you all are having a wonderful Lord's Day!

Rejoice in the Lord

 Hi everyone! I didn't realize it had been so long since I did a post on here, but I thought I'd share an article that I wrote a while back - Enjoy! :)

“Rejoice in the Lord”.  That phrase is written on plaques and hung on walls in houses everywhere.  However, as we take time to think about it, do we really?  How many times do we find ourselves going day to day with a ho-hum attitude, or simply going through the motions?  As Christians, we should be the most joyful people on earth, because we understand our purpose, and have the gift of Life.  I believe that one of the biggest keys to appreciating the wonderful gift of salvation is to understand the ugliness of sin.

Worldliness and sin abound in every place we go, and it’s normal to get used to something if it’s around us 24\7.  But we must fight this if we’re to remain holy.  We’re not to be conformed to this world, but we’re to be transformed (Rom. 12:2).  The state we’d be in if God had never shown His love by sending His Son is truly sobering, but it’s one that we must periodically think on to remind us of the great blessing we’ve received.

It’s not possible for evil to dwell with God (Ps. 5:4), and God’s face is against those who act wickedly (Ps. 34:16). God does not tolerate sin.  Even though he might not destroy mankind for such evildoing as he did in the days of the flood, that doesn’t mean he doesn’t feel just as strongly about it today as he did then.  Sin is serious and we can’t afford to become numbed by it.  Sure, we might not be practicing homosexuality, but what about the “smaller” sins of greed, jealousy, fits of anger, impure speech or envy (Gal. 5:19-21)?  These things are every bit as detrimental to our spiritual life as the “big” issues, and are more of a struggle for most Christians.  Sin cannot dwell with God.  We’re imperfect human beings, and we fall.  Over and over, we need to ask God for his forgiveness.  However, the beauty of what God has given us is that if we’re trying to do right and follow him to the best of our ability, we are continually cleansed and forgiven (1 Jn. 1:7).

How should the knowledge that we have a way to escape death and eternal punishment make us feel?  The knowledge that God still would have sent his Son to die in our place, even if we were the only one he did it for?  I can’t think of anything under the sun that can fill me with more joy.  We don’t deserve life, but God loved us so much that he gave it to us anyway.  What a gift! (Eph. 2:8)

That being said, when we go to worship, why do we sometimes have a less than enthusiastic attitude?  We should feel honored to be able to praise him, thank him, remember him, and give back to him.  Let’s “Be glad when they said to us ‘Let us go into the house of the Lord’”(Ps. 122:1).

With the knowledge we have, our everyday lives can and should be filled with joy and peace.  Do we go about our days in a state of semi-apathy, with a slightly dreary attitude?  The Psalms are full of verses telling us to rejoice and have a happy heart, praising God in our thankfulness.  In my mind, the picture that’s painted from those verses isn’t one of negativity and solemnity. Our hope should bring joy, resulting in a glad heart, which in turn, makes a cheerful face.  If you’re not having the best day, try counting some of your blessings and make a conscious effort to speak cheerful words – not to be ingenuine, but feelings often follow actions.

If you go into your workplace with a ho hum attitude every day, it shows, and if we don’t show joy, or even happiness in our lives, why should people in the world want what we have?  We’re to be lights in the world; a city on a hill that can’t be hidden.  Think for a moment even about your facebook page.  What do our statuses reflect?  So many times I see people post over and again how a certain something annoyed them, disappointed them, or angered them, often never thinking to note what was pleasant or positive in their lives.  This isn’t a healthy attitude, and certainly not a Christlike outlook on life.

Let’s truly delight in the Lord, exult in every new day He brings, appreciate the wonderful gift of salvation, and look forward to opportunities that might come our way!  “A glad heart makes a cheerful face, but by sorrow of heart the spirit is crushed” – Prov. 15:13

A climbin' the hill

A few days ago, Luke, Carey, Jake and I decided to climb a different hill that's near our house.  I think it was only about 3 miles round trip, but this hill was steeper, and the brush was thicker!

We came to this ravine here - isn't it pretty?

"So I don't see any way out of here...where should we go? ...Yeah, I guess you're right, we'll go up!"

 Once we got out of the ravine we found the road again

 It started to get steep right here

 We're soaking up all the green we can before things turn completely brown

Me and....half of Luke's face.  It's hard to get both of our faces in it since he's so tall!

 There was no path at all, or even any areas that weren't a complete jungle of thorns, so we just went through it!  I still have part of one in my leg that I need to dig out......

 We finally reached the top! Here's Jake in his awesomeness.

 Luke and Carey admiring the view

 I wish you could see exactly how enormous this rock is!

 Luke in his awesomeness

Yeah, I'm the oddball in this group!

Luke, me, Jake.  (Just to clarify, Carey is just a friend and coworker, no relation)

I zoomed all the way in onto the "little" hill that we climbed before

 Here it is again...our house is at the base of it.  Annnd, the sun was really bright.  I felt like laying on top of the rock and soaking up some sun like a lizard.

Didn't take many pictures coming down because we were too intent on not falling and dying\being careful not to get our eyes poked out by branches and thorns.

 

We got back sweaty (and stinky. You're welcome you guys) and a bit tired, but it was so much fun!  As an added bit of entertainment I got to sit on the couch that evening and pick ticks off myself, heh heh.  "Begone bloodsuckers!"  Okay that was gross, and I kindof made it up.  I only found one on my leg as we were hiking, muahaha.

Hi ho, hi ho, it's up the hill we go!

A couple days ago Dad, Carey, Luke, Jake and I went climbing up the big rocky hill that's near our house.  In a 1\2 mile, we ascended 500 feet!  Here are a few pictures (All climbing pictures courtesy of Dad!):

 The view - how gorgeous is it!  The house with the blue roof towards the bottom right is our house.

 The rocks are huge!

 Luke, Carey, Jake and I.  I'm such the odd one out, hehe!  Those guys have so much fun together, what a hoot!  Thanks for making me laugh so hard my stomach hurts while I'm trying to haul myself over these rocks...

 Bonnie, Mom and I went into town the other day to have a bite of lunch, and so Bonnie could have a checkup.  She's so brave!

Bonnie lookin' cute while she gets blood drawn

 Er...the toilet.  After one has been used alot, it's a toss up as to which is more preferable - tile or dirt.  I'd have to go with dirt though, because you could slip on the tile, hit your head and get knocked unconscious . Great!

Have a wonderful week, everyone!

Happy Day that celebrates Mothers!

It's been an embarrassingly long time since I've posted. {Ahem}  Nothing like a holiday to get another post out!

Ah, Mother's Day. Where would any of us be without our mothers? Yep, you said it!

I realized that somewhere along the way I refer to her exclusively as "The Mom" (or sometimes "Mum").  Never plain "Mom", but The Mom.  She loves me, she always has, and always will.  She's The Mom.  

(Hi The Mom!)

Dear The Mom,

Thank you for all you do for everyone every single day.  You're such a wonderful example in so many ways - I hope that someday I can be half the person that you are. Thanks for being my parent for all my life, you're definitely firstly that, but now you're also my friend. I love you. Thanks for always making me laugh and smile, teaching me and loving me, even though I do strange things like try to waltz around the kitchen with you every other day.

Love, Linz

She feeds us, cares for us, and wipes our foreheads and gives us water when we're sick...the list goes on and on.  And all the while loving us, even with our weirdness quirks.

I mean, she puts up with us every day!

Even when we do things like wear cowboy hats just because we're watching a Western movie. 

  (I think we learned it from you, Mom!)

So today, I'm singing along with Mr. T..."Mother, I'll always love her...there is no other!"

 

(And mine's the best. You can't have her! Heh heh. Sorry.)

Abundant life

We've been having several Bible studies lately, that have been going really well.  Every Wednesday and Saturday morning I tag along with Dad and Jake and go to a study that's with 4 young women.  If I remember right, three are Anglican, and one is Methodist.

It's been so encouraging to sit in on these studies!  The women are interested and attentive, and are willing to talk and answer\ask questions.  Alot of people may agree to have a study with you, but while they're fiddling with their phone or staring at a bee buzzing in the window, you get the feeling that they're not really even listening to what's being said.

Being in the study has just reminded me again and again of some things.

Every time I sit in on classes, and watch the people as they see things unfold, it gives me goosebumps.  Every time that we start at the beginning and review God's plan for the world - how he planned for his Son to come and take our place, it brings me to tears.  

In Genesis 3:15, talking about how Jesus will be victorious, and in Acts 2:24 - "God raised him up, loosing the pangs of death, because it was not possible for him to be held by it."

It just brings me to tears and puts me in awe, because what a wonderful and powerful God we serve.  How unworthy we are to even serve Him, but how blessed are we to be able to!

Jesus came so we could have life.  Not just existence, but life.  Abundant, joyful, peace-filled, full life.

Even when the storms come, we're able to take comfort in the knowledge that God's above all, through all, and in all.

~

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly."
 John 10:10

"My lips will shout for joy,when I sing praises to you;
my soul also, which you have redeemed."

Psalms 71:23

 "My soul longs, yes, faints for the courts of the LORD;
my heart and flesh sing for joy
to the living God." 
Psalms 84:2

"But let all who take refuge in you rejoice;
let them ever sing for joy,
and spread your protection over them,
that those who love your name may exult in you." 
Psalms 5:11

 

Love never ends

Right now I'd like to ask prayers on behalf of the Morton and Heck families as they go through the rough time of losing dear Shauna.

Shauna battled hard with cancer for two long years, and her struggle is now over.  

Aunt Shauna - right, with sister Chasity, left

 A wonderful example to all, she was truly one of the best examples I've ever had.

She was constantly in pain

~however~

She was bright

happy

full of smiles and laughter

never complaining

always unselfish

always trusting in God

encouraging 

kind

patient

While she may not be with us anymore here on earth, she is now well and whole, being comforted by the mighty hand of God.

We have the comfort of knowing that someday, we will be reunited in The Place where there will never be suffering, pain, or tears.  

But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about those who are asleep, that you may not grieve as others do who have no hope.

~I Thessalonians 4:13~

Running Route

I've been wanting to take some pictures of the scenery, and of where we go running, but when we're actually doing a more serious run, I never want to tote along my camera, so Luke and I took a bike ride, and I was able to finally get a few to show you!

 A nice downhill towards the beginning of our route...and it turns into a nice uphill when we're almost home on the way back.

 I actually love this uphill!  It's not super long, so I like to try and power up it.

 A while after the hill, there's a nice straightaway.

 A nice downhill

 The seemingly huge uphill that used to seem to take forever to run up!  It's not so bad now though, thankfully!

 

  Then I didn't take any more pictures until we were headed back to the house.  Isn't the scenery pretty?  It's the rainy season right now, so things and green and lovely!

As a side note, make sure to check out Cookie Monster, since it's just been updated!  And as a "not so side" side note, you really should go look at Luke's blog, because he has some really great posts!

The Power of a Positive Wife: Chapter 1

Last time, we took a peek at the introduction for this book.  This post will take an overview of chapter one of The Power of a Positive Wife.

Chapter 1 [part one]: The Impact of a Positive Wife

 This chapter starts out asking the question, "If you could choose the one ingredient that makes a great wife, what would it be?"..."What if her every waking moment is motivated by the question, 'What can I do to make my husband's world a better place?'...this would be great attention, but the most important ingredient is God-centerdness."  In this book, Karol Ladd stresses the important of a personal relationship with Christ, and spiritual growth.  If we're truly God-centered, and trying our best to apply biblical principles to our lives, we will try to please our husbands to the best of our ability.  Pleasing our husbands in everything, however, is not our #1 motivation.  "Her walk with God allows her to keep the other areas of her life in balance". 

Karol reminds that marriage is all about two unique individuals using their individual talents to strengthen and balance the marriage.  For, "Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work" (Eccl. 4:9).  We're encouraged to take stock of our talents and abilities, and find ways to use them in the best way.

In Romans 12:9-12, 15,16, Paul talks about devoted, true love.  He never asks if the other person treats us with love first.  "Showing love means helping others become better people".  The book states that we should be as blind to our husbands faults as we can, and encourage him in his good areas.  Obviously, she's not talking about a glaring sin problem, and occasions do arise when we'll need to point something out to the hubby that he can try to better himself at - she's simply talking about day to day life; encouraging us to dwell on the positive, not the negative!

When women are hurt by their husbands, they might often be tempted to try to get back at him by giving the silent treatment, use spiteful words, or even withhold intimacy.  Karol gives us the example of Paul.  He had "every right" to try to get even with his enemies, but he chose to forgive and move on.  "We need to practice the profound principle of forgiving...what does an I'm-going-to-get-you-back attitude do for us? Do they make us better people or just bitter ones?" 

 
Wives set the tone for their homes.  Proverbs 19:13, 14 says, "a nagging wife annoys like a constant dripping...but only the Lord can give an understanding wife".  Our attitudes and actions are like air fresheners.  If someone walks into our home, they can either breath in deeply and smile, or wrinkle their noses in disgust.

The last part of chapter one talks about control; Let's see what Karol has to say.  "What do wives want to control? Circumstances, for one.  We want to keep the people and things around us healthy, happy and safe.  Our families, for two.  Many of us want to control our husbands and children - to micromanage their every action."  She encourages us to identify what areas in our life we try to control, and turn it over to God.  It's not our job to try to control our families, and every circumstance in our life; when we see flaws in our husbands, sometimes we're tempted to think it's our job to try to change his ways, but that's not our job.  Our job is to encourage him in good ways, and take his name to God in prayer.

"What is your greatest weakness or challenge in your marriage?  We all know marriage is not a stroll down Easy Street...it's more like a drive Flaws and Weaknesses Lane...The question is not, 'Do you have challenges?' The question is, 'Where do you go for help, power, and strength through the challenges?"

 

Happy birthday, Candice!

Today is my friend Candice's birthday.  

Ah, how far we've come together!  We used to play with baby dolls, and nail polish, and convince the others to play dress up with us.  Now we talk every chance we get , even though we're separated by many miles.  We also have an insane number of nicknames for each other.  Alot of mine involve some form of 'Punkin'.  But let's not get too far into that...

We love to skype!

Happy birthday, Candice!

~Eye Heart Ewe!~

The Power of a Positive Wife: Introduction

When we were staying with my grandparents on furlough, I happened to see a book on Nanna's shelf that was entitled, "The Power of a Positive Wife".  I thought it looked interesting, so I picked it up and started to thumb through it.  Before I knew it, I had my notebook and pen out, furiously taking notes.  My sweet and generous Nanna saw me, laughed a little, and gave me another copy she happened to have tucked away!

Now, I'm obviously not a wife, but I really love this book; it has so many good points.  Even though it's about how wives should relate to their husbands (which is very helpful to read, even though I'm not married yet), it has so many things I can apply to everyday life with all of my family. 

I thought I would take one blog post at at time, and share some good parts from each chapter!

 

Introduction:

It starts out with a 4 page introduction where it generally outlines the book, and the overall purpose.  The book starts out with this: "Let me guess...you fully intended to be a positive wife when you first got married...but somewhere between the 'I do' and the 'happily ever after' you found yourself struggling...and suddenly you found that you weren't all you intended you would be".  "...If I gaze into my husbands eyes, it might be that I'm trying to get him to help with the kids or take out the trash."  The book's emphasis is on how wives should react to their husbands, regardless of what the husband's behavior might be.

She tries to stress the importance of the wife's personal relationship with God.  "The positive wife doesn't look only to her husband to fill her with joy and contentment, she looks to her heavenly Father".  She goes on to say that every marriage will have problems, because both the husband and wife do, but the real question that determines the state of a marriage is how we will handle those problems.

Hopefully you'll enjoy the quick look of this book, and if it interests you, maybe you'll even think about getting a copy of your own!

 

Happy birthday, Jake!

Today is Jacob's 22nd birthday!  If you all would like to wish him a happy one, please do!

 Happy birthday, Jacob!

Iringa

Here are just a few pictures that I hope you'll enjoy!

 Driving down to Iringa.  I think Panya wanted to be the figurehead...

This is how Don and Axe spent their time.

This is how Panya spent her time.

Or this...(what a cutie!)

Since there was no AC, we had all the windows rolled down the entire trip.  It was a liiiittle windy! 

 This is our backyard.  Note the handy little spigot in the middle there...

 The front yard!  Isn't it pretty up there?  The scenery is definitely different than in the North.  

Heh heh.  We have two mango trees, and the dogs snack on the fallen fruit all day long.  Panya has a fat little mango belly!

Going running with deh boys! 

Really!

Hopefully a new post with pictures will be coming soon! 

----------------------

 Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.

Romans 12:12

We made it

Thank you all so much for the prayers - we've made it safely down to Iringa, and have been getting everything sorted out.

I hardly know what day it is right now, everything seems pretty jumbled up, but let's see if I can give you a bit of what's happened!

A truck came last Tuesday afternoon, and we were able to get everything loaded up, and the truck locked.  We had sleeping bags out still, so we slept at our house that night and got up early Wednesday morning and started driving!   

Mom and Dad were in the Land Cruiser pulling the trailer that had our suitcases and sleeping bags, etc. in it, and the boys and I were in the Wagon with the dogs.  Don and Axe were in the very back and they did great, except for getting really hot.  They made it through the trip without dying - yes!  I was in the middle seat with the ice chest and Panya.  She was really good too, just went back and forth between laying down and looking out my window.  She liked to growl at giraffes and impala we passed!

We got to Iringa at probably around 10pm, and slept at an inn.

The next morning we got to our house, and started getting everything unpacked!  Since then, we've pretty much been doing the same things - unpack, carry boxes, unpack, take apart empty boxes...ask other family members "Do you want this?" every few minutes.  Heh heh.

We worshiped with the brethren here on Sunday; the building is about 20 minutes from our house.  Mwakalonge preached a good sermon, and the people were friendly.  

Hopefully we'll get internet up at the house in a few days.  It'll be nice when things get settled in enough to get back into a regular schedule.

Has anyone made any goals for the New Year?  I've written down a few general guidelines for myself.  They're not resolutions, since I've been doing them anyway, but New Year's is a convenient time to look at goals, etc. you have.

Here are a few of mine:

 - Daily Bible study and prayer time

 - Drink at least a couple of glasses of water a day 
(I usually drink a litre or two a day, but this is just so if I don't drink that much in a day, I at least get something!)

 - Exercise 3 times a week\train to run a 10K
(Hopefully more, but this is so I don't set myself up for disaster, haha) 

So there we have it, hope you all are having a great week!

 ~

 Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice.

Philippians 4:4